The Lake

The Lake Pt. II

Pillbug

Farmers' Market

Farmers' Market Pt. II

Farmers' Market Pt. III

       I have this weird delusion that I'm a lot more rugged than I actually am. I fancy myself the Brawny man or the hero of some western, but the truth is, if the zombie apocalypse were to come tomorrow I think I'd probably starve to death pretty quickly. I know this because this week I attempted to forage for my food. I decided that I would only eat what I could forage for three days. So, on day one, I got up at 0430, strapped the kayak onto the car and hit the lake. The plan was to catch my lunches and dinners for the next few days. The plan failed. After several hours on the lake, inadvertently submerging my phone and hanging a few irrecoverable lines in trees, I retreated home. By the early afternoon, the grasshopper sitting on the hood of my car looked mighty tasty. That's when I decided that I was basically attempting to prove that I could starve myself for three days. I gave up and rode off into the sunset like Shane, or maybe more like the coward Robert Ford. Regardless, I realized that my foraging skills are shit. I'll keep my fingers crossed the zombies don't decide to go apocalypsing any time soon.

       With foraging off the table, going to the farmers' market seemed like the next rugged thing. I love fresh produce —green tomatoes, red tomatoes, potatoes, cantaloupe, peaches, etc. We bought some of each and then some. Thankfully, that means no grasshoppers for me. And now I'd like to leave you all with a little joke that I just made up: "What did the dad say to the melonhead dating his daughter...? You cantaloupe."